[LN] Tomodachi no Ushiro de Kossori Tewotsunaide - Volume 1 - Chapter 11 - Part 2

 

Chapter 11 - Light in the Night Sky (Part 2)

Since my older sister and Totchi-niichan left the neighborhood, I've become more cheerful and able to communicate.

"Hey, Dad. Wake up quickly! Breakfast is ready."

"Hoaam~I was so sleepy from staying up until midnight. But when I saw Yoru's face, my spirits suddenly returned!"

"Ufufu. I'm glad to hear that, but you can't say that with your pants half open. That could be sexual harassment yo..."

Maybe because of the loneliness after my older sister left, I forced myself to change.

I'm sure Dad is lonely too, but if I keep moping around, I might make him worry even more.

However, the cheerful and talkative me is only a limited edition of Narushima Yoru.

When I entered middle school, I also joined a girls' group. And there I was still the quiet and shy Narushima Yoru.

I didn't know what to talk about with my friends, and when someone asked me to talk, I was always afraid that I would say something strange. Basically, there was no development in me.

Even though I was in junior high school, I still couldn't find friends to have fun with.

Of course, compared to 5th grade, I could understand what my classmates were talking about, and sometimes I even paid attention to their conversations.

But still,

"Hey, hey, a few days ago, I went out with Kurokawa-kun from the second grade, and we held hands too!"

"Eh, that handsome Kurokawa-kun? You're doing well too!"

But if they're already discussing romance, I'm no longer interested in the conversation.

"Hey, Narushima-san. You think so too, right?"

Of course, I still tried to follow their conversation.

"Uh, Etto... yeah, I guess Kurokawa-kun is really handsome..."

Because of my shyness, I ended up sounding like this.

I had a date with an older man named Totchi-niichan.

Compared to Totchi-niichan, all the men here look like children to me.

One of them was Kurokawa-kun, who was always getting on the nerves of the girls in my class. It didn't occur to me that he was a cool guy. I just saw him as a kid.

The day my older sister and I fought for the first and last time,

That was the day I thought I had fallen in love with Totchi-niichan and became very jealous.

Since then, I have always wondered.

Is my "liking" for Totchi-niichan "love"?

I'm sure it must be different. Maybe it is. Maybe it is.

I don't have any proof, so I want to feel in love.

I want to strengthen my heart and tell my older sister that she doesn't have to be jealous.

Then, when it happened,

I want to feel the burning love like my older sister who chose a man over his biological sister.

I want to feel the blind love that can make me feel crazy jealousy.

But I wasn't interested in my classmates at all.

I was so thirsty for love, but I couldn't find anyone to give it to me.

But suddenly there was a turning point.

As usual, I came home from school with the usual group of girls.

"Hey, those high school girls over there. Would you like to go karaoke with us?"

A boy in a high school uniform approached us.

"No thanks. Come on guys, let's go."

One of us said this and then walked by looking down.

The high school student gave us a way to pass. He seemed to be half joking.

"Ah, too bad. I'll ask you again next time."

He waved him hand.

"Hmm? What's wrong?"

I was the only one still there, and they all looked at me in surprise.

"Wait, Narushima-san. Hurry and come here!"

The girls called to me in a low voice.

Even I...

"Anu... About the karaoke you mentioned earlier, will you take me with you?"

The man is a 3rd year high school student. 18 years old.

Although they seemed like gangsters at first, they were much more mature than my classmates.

When they made way for the girls, I actually retreated slowly to the side of the road, and even when the high school boys talked to me, they pulled me away saying, "It's dangerous.

But since I'm a person who seeks love from adults, I think it's only natural that I accept their invitation.

"You, Yoru-chan, right? Is it okay if you come alone? What about your friends?"

"Ah, Etto... no problem, really. Besides, I'm in the mood for karaoke."

"Well, even though she seems quiet, it turns out that she's also quite aggressive. Let's play the first song right away."

A very excited man entered a song, then another man sitting next to me said to me.

"You better call your friends. I'm sure they're very worried about you."

His name is Kawano.

He was the only one of the men with a calm demeanor.

"Ah, that's right..."

When I took out the latest hand phone my father had given me for entering junior high, Kawano took out his as well.

"Do you use social networking sites? If you want, I'll give you my account."

He said that just as I pulled out my phone.

The way she did it was unique and impossible for a middle schooler to imitate, and it made me smile reflexively.

Since we had shared contacts, I often went out alone with Kawano.

We went to fast food restaurants, shopping, and movies.

It was a pretty fun date.

I say "pretty" because for someone who is so enthusiastic about love, I think it was far from decent.

During recess, the girls in my usual group would talk to me.

"Hey, hey Narushima-san, are you going out with that high school guy from yesterday?"

"Uh... how about it? I mean, maybe it hasn't gotten to that stage yet..."

I've heard about the unique culture in Japan where you start dating after confessing your feelings.

But Kawano seems to like me, and I've never hated him. So when you say that our relationship is like boyfriend and girlfriend, I don't think it's wrong.

But I don't think I can really agree with that.

Because I'm still figuring out whether I can love Kawano or not.

"Unexpectedly, Narushima-san turns out to be quite aggressive..."

There's a girl who supports me.

"But yeah, you suddenly followed the invitation of an unknown high school boy. Isn't that dangerous? I was very surprised at that time..."

And there was also a girl who warned me.

The "dangerous" thing happened shortly after that.

.........................................................

Kawano said he had a part-time job, so we made an appointment to meet on Sunday evening.

We had dinner together, and when we finished, it was time for us to go home.

"There's a coffee shop I want to visit."

Kawano told me.

I had no reason to refuse his invitation, so I just followed him.

But I was surprised that the cafe he wanted to go to didn't arrive, and we ended up in the Love Hotel area, which was a bit far from the station.

"Huh? If I'm not mistaken, it's around here... but I seem to be wrong."

I could already read it from him sentence.

"Yeah, that's okay. Hey Yoru-chan, you're tired of walking, right? How about we rest here together?"

Unlike when he asked to exchange contacts, this time there was nothing unique at all. What he did was not mature at all, and the mode he used was like a cheap joke that disappointed me.

"So sorry... If it's something like that, it seems a little..."

At that moment, I was no longer interested in Kawano.

Although I played with him a few times and I think there were many fun parts, it seems that I can't fall in love with him after that. The fact that he insists on wanting my body is proof of that.

That's why I'm trying to go back home.

"Wait a minute."

He pulled at my hand with a rather strong.

"You've known me for a month, and you still won't let me kiss you."

"Uh, so-so... things like that can only be done after we know each other better."

"Then let's get to know each other here. Let's go inside first. This moment is very important."

Kawano pulled me strongly until we were close to the entrance of the hotel.

"Wait...please stop. I...don't want this..."

"What are you doing at a time like this? You used to go to karaoke with us alone, so you're used to men, right?"

As a junior high school student, I couldn't possibly rebel against the power of a high school junior.

A memory that was sealed in the bottom of my heart and that I didn't want to remember suddenly appeared in my mind.

It was the day I peeked into my older sister's room and saw her with Totchi-niichan doing────.

"I don't want to!"

Then, for the first time, I slapped someone on the cheek.

Kawano held her cheek and looked at me sharply.

"Damn you!"

He continued to stare at me sharply with an aura of anger on him body.

"Ah, so... I'm sorry for everything..."

Before I could finish my sentence, I was running straight down the asphalt road.

I don't even remember which direction I was running.

When I realized it, I was sitting on a bench in the fountain area next to the station.

I looked around. Kawano hadn't followed me all the way here. Besides, it was crowded, so even if I met him, he wouldn't dare to do anything violent to me.

"Haaah....haah..."

At that moment I noticed that my breathing was labored. My heart was also racing.

I thought about buying a drink, but I didn't have any change, so I decided not to.

Then my fingers, my hands, my arms, and my whole body shook.

I was scared. I was really scared.

I was really stupid.

Even though there are many ways for this kind of thing to happen.

But I didn't realize I was in danger until Kawano pulled my hand.

It was like that from the beginning when I followed Kawano and his friends from high school.

All I thought about was whether I could fall in love with someone older.

I never thought that they would abuse me.

So it almost happened───.

The "secret love" practiced by my older sister and Totchi-niichan flashed through my mind for a moment.

I shook my head.

No, I won't, I won't, I won't. Before I know what love is, I don't want to do this.

I don't think I'm going to force myself to approach an older man again.

Just like junior high school kids, if I spend my time with my classmates, I'm sure I can find normal love from my classmates. Yes, I'm sure I would. I think that's okay too.

I thought so as I tried to get up from the bench.

But suddenly my feet stopped.

Normal love?

What the hell is this?

Is it "love" that separates one's older sister from a man just because of her selfish ideas?

Is it "love" whose magic can turn my kind, wise and clever older sister into a different person?

Can I get such crazy love from my classmates who are just kids?

"Hey lady, what are you doing here so late?"

While I was still standing there, a man called out to me.

It wasn't Kawano.

He was an office worker in his 20s, wearing a neat suit.

"If you have a problem, can you tell it to this mature brother? Would you like to stop by the family restaurant first?"

Ah, really.

Even though I don't know what love is yet.

I just want it so much. Even though something dangerous just happened to me.

"Yes, I'm coming."

But again, I followed the adults' invitation.

Since I'm so thirsty for love, I must be going crazy.

I'm definitely not going to stop until I find out what love is.

I met that office worker a few times. But he was a iy's easy to increase sexual desire who couldn't even hide his lustful desires, so I stopped contacting him right away.

After that, I really thought about looking for acquaintances on SNS or apps like that.

For a junior high school student, there are so many ways to meet adult men.

Unintentionally, at a very coincidental time, I received an invitation from a senpai in my school.

But because I felt that the 3rd year senpai was far from being an adult in my opinion, I never saw him again shortly after that.

As a result, I often received invitations from 3rd year senpai.

Narushima Yoru is a girl who won't refuse if you ask her out.

Rumors like that spread around the school.

Well, I didn't refuse anyway.

If someone older invites me, I will definitely accept at first.

To see if I could fall in love with him or not, I accepted his invitation.

There are some men whose nature I can find out just by playing with them once, and there are others whose nature I can find out only after going out with them a few times.

Whenever I felt someone wasn't right for me, I blocked him and waited for him to contact me again.

It happened over and over again.

Eventually, when I was in the second year of junior high school and my body became more mature, I got more and more invitations from people in the city. The later it got, the more likely it was that someone would ask me out.

But the things I did remained the same.

Could I fall in love with this person? Is he the one for me to give my body and soul to?

When someone invites me out, I accept the invitation while observing them.

Then I categorize them according to whether they are attractive or not and sort them out.

But all the people I have met I still put in the "not suitable" box.

It repeats over and over again. It's like a machine doing the same thing over and over again.

From high school students to college students, from freelancers to office workers. I've walked with many kinds of men and sorted them all out.

I've been in danger a few times, too, until I got used to it.

I've been dragged to a hotel and forced to kiss them.

Then I slapped them on the cheek and went home.

That's about it.

Sometimes I fight them by hitting, biting, and scratching.

Eventually, I was no longer afraid of them.

Of course, by then none of the girls at my school would talk to me.

"Huh? Turns out Narushima-san is like that?"

"Don't you know? When she was in the first grade, she often got fucked by the third graders.」"

"...I've also heard that she once walked in the middle of town with an office man."

 "Really? She looks like a quiet girl. Turns out she's not what she looks like, huh?"

"She's secretly like a bitch. She's a bad person, and you'd better not go near her."

I heard such words behind me, but I didn't care. I wasn't going to stop.

You see, even that day I had an appointment with a man.

Then I'm sure I'll meet him and block him again as usual.

I guess it's not strange to say that I was mentally possessed by the curse of love.

When I kept repeating it, I didn't realize that I was already in the third year of junior high school.

I do not remember when it started, but one day.

I was in the city with some people I didn't know.

It was a holiday, and I was shopping alone on my way home from school.

Suddenly, a group of scary looking men surrounded me.

"Hey Yoru-chan, come play with us~」."

I realized that one of them must be someone who used to be a stupid.

I'm sure this condition is one of their retaliations for suddenly being unable to contact me.

A group of boys surrounded me and invited me to play, wondering what kind of things they could do to me, and I thought I would end up having a miserable time.

It's very scary to be surrounded by a group of men you don't know.

They come after you out of the blue, regardless of time or place, and it's very scary.

Of course, at that time, I thought I couldn't fight it, and I just kept running.

I'd run to an area where there were a lot of people, or I'd hide in the women's bathroom.

But there were too many of them. I was just a 14-year-old girl, and my strength was very limited. Until one day they caught me.

They took me away in a van full of smoke.

I was so scared, but I didn't cry, even though I didn't know where they were taking me.

Until I got to a bar in the basement where they always seemed to hang out.

"Oh, is that Narushima Yoru, the girl I heard rumors about?"

A man in his 30s with short hair and a large tattoo on his hand, sitting on the VIP sofa, said this in a casual tone.

He was called "Masashi-san" by the people around him.

He had a calm demeanor, but he was a dangerous person, and I didn't know what he would do when he got angry.

That was my first impression of Masashi, and I immediately understood that this man was the one who told them to bring me here.

My mouth was filled with fear, but I tried to say something while continuing to stare at him.

"What do you want from me?"

I'd rather bite my tongue to death than let them attack me before I understand what love is.

And before that, I will beat them up as much as I can.

I thought this seriously while looking at the crystal ashtray on the table.

And it seemed that Masashi understood what I meant.

"Ahaha... you're just as rumored. A pretty and calm looking girl, but she's just a stupid and stubborn 3rd year junior high school girl who often makes a scene in town. I'm interested in you, so I'll kidnap you first."

They seem to be different from the people who used to chase me.

"You're beautiful and brave too. Hey, Yoru-chan, would you like to work here? I happen to be looking for someone like you. It doesn't matter if you're only a junior high school student."

"I won't do it." I flatly refused.

"Don't worry. This place isn't as bad as you think. Still, I'm pretty well known to the idiots in town, you know? If you keep this up, they'll catch you one day."

After he said that, I could no longer refuse her.

Masashi is the one who runs several bars, live-houses, and clubs among his friends.

He hired me as an alcohol server, sometimes at the livehouse and sometimes at the club, depending on where he told me to be.

Of course, my identity as a junior high school student was a secret known only to Masashi and his colleagues.

He was very happy that I had helped him. But I still firmly believed that Masashi was a very dangerous and troublesome person. It even seems that he was once involved with an anti-socialist group.

I don't know what kind of relationship Masashi has with his friends, and I don't want to find out.

It's just that I often saw him flirting with a rough looking man when there were no customers.

And their flirting had become commonplace.

But no matter how mature Masashi's friends were, I always rejected their advances.

However, as long as I was under Masashi, I realized that the day would come when I could no longer refuse.

That's why I started to stay away from Masashi.

Finally, when I graduated from middle school, I cut off contact with him completely.

Then a month ago.

My older sister went back to my parents' house, so I started to force myself to live independently.

When I left my hometown, I thought I would never see Masashi and his friends again.

But it didn't seem to be that easy.

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